Lifestyle

Last night my daughter was having a meltdown, refusing to go to sleep - she wanted to finish her panda mask so that she could wear it to bed. Upon packing up she realised she forgot to add the horn, “what panda has a horn I asked?”. Tears in her eyes, screaming “a Unicorn panda mummy!” as she shot me a death stare and I was left feeling like an imbecile. Sometimes, most of the time, motherhood throws you a curveball, but you roll with it. I felt grateful I don’t have additional stress in my life at this stage as I simply don’t have energy or time for anything else on top. This brings me precisely to the point I want to make in this article - motherhood is already stressful enough, there’s no need to add more stress especially if your goal is weight loss.

Back to basics

Most mums who want to lose weight think I need to go on a diet. The truth is there isn’t one way to eat to lose weight. Don’t believe me? If you think you need to eat high protein, low carb to lose weight, then look at trim and terrific vegans (or vegetarians) who pretty much live on a high carbs, low protein diets. How do you explain that? Perhaps it’s better to eat smaller, more frequent meals to keep our metabolism high? But wait, a bunch of your friends have lost a tremendous amount of weight doing the exact opposite - eating larger, less frequent meals when they went on an intermittent fasting diet.

If your goal is weight loss – rather than giving your current diet a complete face lift. Try to master these fundamentals first:

1) Eat mindfully and calmly

2) Eat more fruit and veggies

3) Move your body

Going on a strict diet without first mastering these fundamentals is like saying you’re going to start exercising 7 days a week when you already find it hard to fit in regular exercise. Not impossible but extremely hard to do!

Forget the “if you’re not doing it tough, you’re not trying hard enough” attitude

You don’t need complexity to get incredible results. Good nutrition helps us look, feel, and perform our best. But another element of good nutrition that we don’t often think about is how easy it is for us to actually stick to it? The best nutrition for you is the one you can actually stick to because it takes into account your lifestyle, personal preference, and available time.

Lifestyle: I exercise 3-4 times a week doing mostly HIIT exercise and strength training.

So, about 30/40% of my food intake will be carbs. Because I’m relying on glucose, the basic building block of carbs, as my body’s main source of energy for working muscles. However, mums who are less active or prefer lower intensity exercises might only need 10/20% carbohydrates in their diet.

Personal preference: I like the ideas that I can be flexible with my eating - eat anything, with anyone, at any time. Eating is not just eating but a bonding time with my loved ones. While, I think Keto and intermittent fasting have some amazing health benefits, it just something that doesn’t work for me. I want to be able to sit down to have a meal with my family when we’re ready rather than when the clock tells me. I also like carbs and sweet things, so I’m not willing to give that up for a Keto diet.

Available time: I eat out about 1-3 times, but most of the time my husband and I will cook big batches of food. We cook, freeze, and eat leftovers. I don’t have time to cook every night. When I do have time, I don’t want to spend it on cooking. I’d rather take the kids to the park or hang out with them on our balcony. Some mums might enjoy cooking, they might even cook with their kids. Other mums with very young kids and no help might like the convenience of being able to order in.

The human body adapts amazingly well to many different ways of eating. We can be healthy and fit whether we eat mostly meat (carnivore diet), mostly carbohydrate (vegan and vegetarian), mostly fat (Keto) as long as we consistently do the basics well.

In fact, next time you feel like you’re doing it tough, I encourage you to use this “resistance” as a guide and ask yourself what else you can try? Chances are you just haven’t found a solution that works for you yet. One of my clients found it hard to motivate herself to go to the gym. Even though she desperately wanted to get fit again after pregnancy she never found exercise fun. This was the resistance that kept her from sticking to exercise. It wasn’t until she joined postpartum group exercises that for the first time, she enjoyed exercising and was able to develop lasting healthy habits with her exercise.

About Gale

I work with busy mums to help them become strong, lean, confident women. Women who take on greater challenges beyond exercise, translating into happier mums, and great role models for their kids.

My Mummy First is a deeply transformative programme that makes weight loss and healthy living fun, in a supportive community of mums that support, celebrate and lift each other up to become the best versions of themselves.

Gale Ruttanaphon

Founder My Mummy First, Fitness coach with Pre/Post Natal Specialisation, Corporate Speaker, Life Coach, Mother of two

More available on: www.mymummyfirst.com

Instagram: MyMummyFirst

Facebook: MyMummyFirst

by John Wolcott,

Just the other day while eating family dinner, my wife and I started talking about the idea of returning to America. The conversation then transitioned to the differences between Thai and American cultural values and the ways in which Thais and Americans differ. My 7 -year -old daughter, whose eyes darted between my wife and I as we took turns talking, swung her head and asked, “Daddy, do American people eat this too?”

I was confused, not at her question, but that she would speak of American people as being different from herself - —especially since she was born in America. “You realizerealise you ’are American, too, right?” I said. She tilted her chin into her neck and giggled, and although I chuckled as well, it got me thinking about how my daughter identifies—or does not identify—with the American culture of which I’m from, and whether that lack of identity may somehow affect her if we move back or she wants to study or work in the states.

Would my daughter grow up to be a culturally rootless soul, failing to connect with American culture? Or would she somehow benefit from being what I discovered are Tthird culture kids, children who spend their developmental years in cultures other than their parents’ home countries.

I asked other non-Thai families and people who were raised in Thailand about their experiences, and I discovered there are three primary ways that you can teach your son or daughter about your home culture’s values while raising him or her in Thailand, so that when they return to your native country, they are well -adjusted.

Take occasional family holidays back home

Frances Watthanaya, who heads a programme in Northeastern Thailand for at -risk youth, is a Canadian native who now lives in a rice farming village in the Mueang Yang District of Nakhon Ratchasima with her Thai husband and 10 -year -old daughter. Unlike many of her compatriot families who live in Bangkok, Frances has almost no access to Canadian culture save for the occasional television show. Because of her extreme case, Frances believes there is only one way to teach her daughter about the cultural values of Canada.

“Spend time in both countries,” she said. “Spending time in Canada is the most important and the only way I can really instil those values in her. She has to see it and experience it for herself.”

You may not live in rural Thailand, but your child will still benefit from the occasional trip back home. They’ll have time to play with cousins, listen to grandparents recount family stories, and see how people interact day-to-day. This will teach your son or daughter more about your culture’s values than words or movies or music. If it’s not possible to fly back home regularly, though, you can still expose your children to your home culture right here in Thailand.

Join clubs, societies, or international schools

Although the world is slowly moving away from tribalism, children need to feel like they belong to a group who shares similar values to form a healthy sense of identity. One way to accomplish this is by enrolling your child into clubs, societies, or international schools where he or she can associate with people from your native culture. By doing so, this will prepare them for life outside of Thailand if they choose to study or work in your home country.

In fact, it doesn’t matter where you come from in the world, you will most likely be able to find a place to take your children to expose them to your home country’s values. You can do this by enrolling them in one of the country’s hundreds of international schools, or by visiting a smaller club.

Kevin Amlid, whose Norwegian father and Thai mother own a self-storage business in Pattaya, always found himself immersed in Norwegian culture when he was growing up. His father would take him and his younger brother to the Norwegian Seaman’s Church for two main celebrations every year: the Norwegian Constitution Day and Christmas Eve.

Amlid didn’t know it at the time, but he was picking up on the values of Norwegian culture through osmosis, so when he eventually left Thailand to study in Norway, he was able to adjust a little more easily than if he had never experienced anything about Norway while in Thailand.

If you live in one of Thailand’s multi-cultural cities like Bangkok, Phuket, Pattaya, or Hua Hin, you should have no problem finding a place to bring your child to introduce them to your home culture. But with that said, the best place to instil your home country’s values may be at home.

Highlight the positive aspects of your culture

The easiest way to teach your children about your home country’s values is to talk about the positive aspects of your culture with them. After all, studies show that the family is the most important unit when it comes to children learning about culture1. This means you as a parent can influence what your child learns about that culture, even if you’re not currently living in it.

This was the case for Caitlin Lee, an American who moved to Thailand when she was 5 years old. Despite growing up in Thai society and relating more as a Thai, her American parents always taught her about the positive values that they themselves experienced while growing up in Southern United States.

“I’m still redneck and I haven’t let that go,” Lee said. “I come from a long line of farmers, and I’ve had that type of work ethic instilled in me from quite a young age, and I find that to be quite American.”

Now that Lee has her own child, a 15 -year -old son, she now finds it valuable to teach him about the value of hard work. With that said, though, she also thinks there are more important cultural values to instil in her son, values that aren’t always taught to kids in Thailand.

“Just because someone is your teacher or your boss doesn’t mean they have the right to do or say anything to you,” she continued. “That is a very un-Thai way of going about things, which I’m currently learning with my son going to Thai school. And I’m trying to instil that value in him; just because someone is a teacher doesn’t mean they’re allowed to bully you.”

The inverse of that value to stand up for yourself would be to comply even if you know you might be in the right. And perhaps this ties into the value of saving face in Thailand. And if that’s so, Lee also wants her son to know that it’s okay to make mistakes, even if someone points them out.

“I grew up with a very American sense of humour,” she said, “and the whole thing with being able to look at yourself and laugh at yourself is a very American thing. The way I was raised is that you fall down, you laugh, and you get back up. I’ve had to work quite hard to teach my son the same thing because losing face here seems to be a little more severe.

“This teaches us how to grow and be humble and laugh in the face of adversity, and I think it’s something that should be instilled in every culture, to realise your negatives points and be able to embrace them and grow with them instead of feeling you need to hide them or get angry when someone points them out.”

Once thing’s for certain, no matter what cultural values we want to instillinstil in our children, we can only do so by consciously embracing them, acting them out, and talking about them with our sons and daughters.

1 https://www.nap.edu/read/9197/chapter/3#13

Bio

John Wolcott is an American who’s been living in Thailand since 2014 with his wife and two daughters. When not writing or editing travel narratives, profiles, and feature stories, he likes to travel the country and practice photography.

Sources:

Frances Watthanaya: [email protected]

Kevin Amlid: https://www.facebook.com/kevin.aamlid

Caitlin Lee: https://www.facebook.com/caitlin.haas

How comfortable do you feel being uncomfortable?
by Isabel Valle, Peak Performance Strategist

One of our most basic human needs is the need to feel safe. We crave certainty, stability and consistency, and yet, we have to live with constant uncertainty. Operating in a VUCA world, used to describe the rapidly transforming global business landscape, we are challenged by our ability to make sound decisions, lacking sufficient information, creating “best guesses” strategies knowing they may turn out badly, not fully understanding the constant changes and factors which could implicate our decision making and problem-solving abilities, and the overall success of our businesses.

The fact is that our brains are not hardwired to operate in today’s complex times. This is especially true when it comes to dealing with uncertainty. When faced with it, our brain’s automatic response is to proceed with overwhelming caution and fear to ensure our survival, pushing us to overreact. This strategy worked great eons ago, when cavemen were faced by constant threats, but that’s not the case today, and it creates challenges and obstacles in the world of business. On the bright side, if you know the right tricks, you can override your brain’s irrational tendencies and handle uncertainty effectively.

In the face of uncertainty, we have to get good at making sound decisions, even when our brain fights us against this. Successful people are able to override this mechanism and shift their thinking towards a rational direction, whilst applying strategies that we will cover in this article.

So fear not, here are some proven strategies that you can use to improve the quality of your decisions when uncertainty is clouding your judgment. What follows are six of the best strategies that successful people use to help their businesses with increasing levels of uncertainty:

1. Embrace uncertainty and accept what you cannot control We all like to be in control. But this desire for control can backfire on us when we are overly focused on what we can’t control. A big part of dealing with uncertainty is accepting the current situation and where you and your business are right now. You need to embrace things that are outside of your control as they are and focus on things that are within your control. People who excel at managing uncertainty aren’t afraid to acknowledge what’s causing it. They live in the real world and don’t paint any situation as better or worse than it actually is, analysing facts for what they are. They know that the only thing they really are able to control is the process through which they reach their decisions. That’s the only rational way to handle the unknown, and the best way to keep your head on level ground. So we mustn’t be afraid to acknowledge what we don’t know, and move forward based on what we do know. We may make mistakes, but that’s a lot better than doing nothing about it. Experts at dealing with uncertainty know they aren’t always going to make the right decision, and that failures will allow them to learn from their mistakes and make better decisions in the future.

2. Assess your particular situation. You need to get a clear understanding of where you and your business are right now. Make sure you have the up to date business and financial performance figures and that you understand your cash flow and forward sales position. Take stock of all aspects of your business and review your business plan often. While most business owners revise business plans once a year, the truth is there’s no limit to how many times you can revise it. It really pays off allocating some time and resources to sit with your key employees to revisit it, putting special attention to key indicators relating to the cash flow. This will help ensure your business goals are reached while working on combating the changes in consumer demands. More importantly, it will help your company to stay afloat in the event of a crisis. Frequently reviewing your business performance, making sure that all aspects of your business are working efficiently and effectively – including people, customer service, processes and procedures, sales and marketing, systems, etc – will help you be ready to deal with anything.

3. Keep abreast of changing trends in your industry. Understand what is happening in the outside world, including customer trends, economic changes, competitor activity and all areas that may impact your business, so you can make more well-informed decisions. Gather information and facts from well-known sources. Keep yourself abreast of the latest economic forecasts, current trends, and the general state of the economy. Ask yourself and your team how you can make better, faster decisions, even when you have less certain data will also help you create a proactive attitude towards the unknown. You must also speak to others and reach out for help and support. In times of uncertainty it is good to speak to trusted contacts to share experiences, gain perspective and gain support. You may also want to seek support from outside and consult the experts. There are future events you can’t forecast even if you’ve been doing business for a long time. For this reason, it pays to lean on the expertise that experts and business advisors provide. While it looks like another expense for your business at the onset, you’ll be surprised how much money they can help you save.
4. 
   Prepare for multiple outcomes. One of the most effective ways to combat uncertainty is to consider a number of possible scenarios and prepare contingency plans for all of them. As you are dealing with uncertainty about the future, you need to be prepared and plan for different possibilities or outcomes. You will need to think through the key risks that may impact your business, using up to date information, and where you assess the risk to be too high, look at spreading the risk, by making assumptions and preparing a flexible plan. Keep revising the plan regularly as things change. Considering multiple options rather than concentrating on one right guess will be more beneficial to your business. When you proactively think through a variety of possible scenarios and work on strategies for all of them, you’ll be better prepared and armed in the event that any of those occur. So instead of trying to make the one right guess as to what will most likely happen, make multiple guesses. This is the way any truly innovative process works, and innovation is a good analogy for prediction. Staying on top of uncertainty is as much about planning for failure as it is about hoping for the best. Once you have a good contingency plan in place, there’s no place for what ifs, stress and worry.

5. Look for unexpected opportunities and possibilities. Instead of expecting the future to deliver something specific, you need to focus instead of what you will do to create the outcome you want. Your actions and intentions are within your control. Uncertainty can create lots of opportunities as other businesses become anxious, indecisive and complacent. Know that new, unexpected opportunities will arise with the changes that are happening, so make sure you are being creative, thinking outside of the box and looking for opportunities. Managing uncertainty requires a strong approach to creating mindset changes. Research into high performing teams globally reveals a common characteristic in that they welcome and are highly resilient to change. How you and your team view change is key here, specifically viewing it as an opportunity rather than a threat.
6. 
   Take decisions and take action. Uncertainty can lead to indecision and inaction. Successful businesses will assess the situation, plan, keep focused, make decisions and take action to stay ahead. Your business must remain agile and flexible, so you can take on a proactive approach and make changes quickly, reacting accordingly. Staying as you are and doing everything in the same way will lead to you losing your way and slipping behind your competitors. There’s no substitute for awareness, listening, and identifying events as soon as they happen. Some decisions can make or break your company. You must focus only on what matters. When it comes down to it, almost every decision contains at least a small factor of uncertainty—it’s an inevitable part of doing business. Learning to properly balance the many decisions on your plate, however, allows you to focus your energy on the things that matter and to make more informed choices. It also removes the unnecessary pressure and distraction caused by a myriad of small worries.

“As you become comfortable with uncertainty, infinite possibilities open up in your life. It means fear is no longer a dominant factor in what you do and no longer prevents you from taking action to initiate change.”
Eckhart Tolle

Uncertainty is inevitable, regardless of the industry where your business belongs. The ability to strategically manage uncertainty is one of the most important skills you can cultivate in an increasingly volatile business environment. Try the strategies above, and your ability to handle uncertainty will take a huge step in the right direction.

Over to you now. How do your uncertainty skills measure up? What do you do when faced with uncertainty? Which strategy from above are you most likely to implement and why?

Here’s to your success!

Isabel x